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widget
04-02-2008, 01:36 PM
"New research suggests that these techniques can have detrimental physiological effects on the baby by increasing the stress hormone cortisol in the brain, with potential long term effects to emotional regulation, sleep patterns and behavior. An infant is not neurologically or developmentally capable of calming or soothing himself to sleep in a way that is healthy. The part of the brain that helps with self-soothing isn't well developed until the child is two and a half to three years of age. Until that time, a child depends on his parents to help him calm down and learn to regulate his intense feelings."

could i have the source of this research? i would love to share it w/ a friend who is insistent on sleep training her infant.

Giselle
04-02-2008, 01:40 PM
Here are a few links having to do with infant sleeping:

http://observer.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,6903,1345420,00.html
http://www.nd.edu/%7Ejmckenn1/lab/culturalarticle.html
http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/sleep.html
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/longterm.html
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/babysleep.html

kaycee
04-02-2008, 02:59 PM
Is co-sleeping a dirty little secret? Everyone I talk to seem to deny it until I admit that I co-sleep... then they all went... yeah yeah, us too! Why is that? I didn't grow up in North America, as far as I know.... most infants sleep together with mom and dad... so, culturally it's normal for me... but I don't understand why people here deny it like it's a shame? well.... that's until you "come out" first...

althara
04-02-2008, 07:19 PM
Is co-sleeping a dirty little secret? Everyone I talk to seem to deny it until I admit that I co-sleep... then they all went... yeah yeah, us too! Why is that? I didn't grow up in North America, as far as I know.... most infants sleep together with mom and dad... so, culturally it's normal for me... but I don't understand why people here deny it like it's a shame? well.... that's until you "come out" first...

It's not the socially "acceptable" way of doing things in the US. But almost everyone does it anyway at one point or another.

joey's mom
04-06-2008, 12:23 PM
It is definitely a "dirty little secret" in the U.S. We use DS's crib more as a playpen if I need to switch laundry over or use the restroom. I got a funny pic of DS playing in his crib and sent it to my mom and her response was, "Was he getting ready to sleep in there?" She knows better! He's never slept in his crib... I'm the crazy, crunchy, hippie of the family! Oh well! :D

PaxMamma
04-06-2008, 12:52 PM
i had to fill out a behavior rating scale for ds1 and "sleeps w/parents" was one of the "behaviors". i proudly gave him a 3!

houseplantgirl
04-08-2008, 01:49 PM
We co-sleep and have gotten alot of guff about it, and nosey questions that are none of their business. Like, if your baby is in your bed, where and how do you DTD? erm,....NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!! And so forth.....so I just don't talk about it, unless I know that the other person is going to be receptive.
I just don't need the flak. I give myself enuf grief over my own choices, I don't need others doing it too. uhg.
I hate that it has to be a "dirty little secret"! We are just being the best moms and dads that we can, and comforting our lil ones!!! HOW is that bad????
ugh!!

happy mum
04-09-2008, 12:39 AM
In Australia it's not quite a dirty little secret but it's definitely not something that is often admitted to. We are the only parents we know at present who co-sleep and quite often receive raised eyebrows and comments like "you know you really should put her in her own bed/own room" etc from other people.

widget
04-09-2008, 12:27 PM
i personally refuse to continue to perpetuate co-sleeping as "a dirty little secret".
if anyone inquires about how my son is sleeping or if were getting any rest i proudly tell them "we're all sleeping great- we co-sleep!"

i don't care what people think. i have no problem flat out telling naysayers and alarmists that their ideas about co- sleeping are outdated, that sleep training doesn't work and that their warnings are based in fear not fact. hey, if people are going to be misinformed busy bodies they have it coming to them.
(and if someone can't figure out how to DTD outside of the bedroom and at night, well,...sucks for them! :))

(Giselle-thanks for posting the research links on sleep training/co-sleeping.)

PaxMamma
04-09-2008, 01:25 PM
We co-sleep and have gotten alot of guff about it, and nosey questions that are none of their business. Like, if your baby is in your bed, where and how do you DTD? erm,....NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!!

i love to tell people, co-sleeping has been the best thing for our sex life!

LisaS
04-09-2008, 02:03 PM
We never intended on co-sleeping. It just happened because, let's face it, we all slept better. I'm sure I was one of those people who had the confused look when told the baby/children slept in bed with the parents. It's amazing how much three children can teach you!

happy mum
04-09-2008, 09:29 PM
i love to tell people, co-sleeping has been the best thing for our sex life!

Heh how true - you're so much more interested when you're both getting sleep. And besides, the bedroom's not the only place to DTD...:D

PaxMamma
04-09-2008, 09:33 PM
Heh how true - you're so much more interested when you're both getting sleep. And besides, the bedroom's not the only place to DTD...:D

well, we actually get very little sleep, but we sure have become adventurous! (sorry, friends who've actually been to our home) :D

happy mum
04-09-2008, 09:42 PM
Actually that's a good point PaxMamma - my DD wakes every 3 hours or so for a feed (she's fully BF) but I find in our situation that I'm not too tired as I don't have to get out of bed to go feed her so I don't really fully wake (and at least hubby gets a complete night's sleep)....

And yep I agree with the being adventurous part too!!:D

joey's mom
04-12-2008, 12:01 PM
It is a "dirty little secret" but I love being a rebel! I kinda enjoy the funny looks people give! I just say, "It works for us." What can people say to that?