Helping her adjust

[smurfsammy]

I've recently started babysitting a 15 month old little girl. I've only babysat her twice and i keep telling myself it will get easier after a few times but there is something i'm struggling with. One, this morning she cried for 45 min after her mother dropped her off. I tried numerous toys to distract her and i tried to offer her hugs as a form of comfort. None of which she was having. She didn't even want to play with my 12 month old. I'm finding it very frustrating as the mom drops her of at 9 in the morning and she has requested that her daughter is put down for a nap in the morning at 10. By the time i get her calmed down i have to put her in the playpen to sleep at 10. The mom is a fan of the CIO method and has stated that I'm to say to her daughter, "nap time", offer her something to drink and walk away. (although i do not use this method with my dd, i do feel it's important to follow the mom's request as i can attest to the frustration felt when someone doesn't listen to mine). THis morning she cried in the play pen for 30 min before i went and got her out finally deciding that she wasn't going to take her morning nap (and unfortunatly because my dd is accustomed to sleeping in the carrier i woke her up trying to retrieve a very angry little girl). I feel so bad for this little girl and would greatly appriciate any suggestions on how i can help her settle down a little quicker and adjust to her new environment?? has anyone had to deal with this situation? what did you do?

[melissa_h]

I moved this to Respond With Sensitivity. Although it is an issue about a daycare situation, you are asking how to respond to the child so I felt it would work in this forum.

I feel for the child, what a troubling situation for her - a new house with people she doesn't know and mommy gone. Have you read the Provide Consistent and Loving Care Principle (http://www.attachmentparenting.org/principles/care.php)? Although it is geared more towards parents, you may be able to get some ideas from it.

[naomifrederickmd]

I think its important for you and her (the baby) to have two weeks as a transition time. I think its silly to expect the same behavior at home to immediately start again at a new location. Of course you also are getting used to this mother and her expectations. Does she ask for specifics when she is picked up? Is this the child's first daycare experience? How many days a week do you have her? Some children are transitioning to 1 nap a day at this age too. Your best bet would be to explain all you are feeling about the situation to the mother and either suggest the method you would like to use, or wait for ideas from her. Chances are the mother has her own feelings regarding this transition also. Wouldn't you?