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Peers replacing parents; what will be missing?

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  • Peers replacing parents; what will be missing?

    Hello Everyone,

    I found the following to be interesting:

    Chapter 1, pg 10
    "Current psychological literature emphasizes the role of peers in creating a child's sense of identity... children often do not even refer to their parents but rather to the values and expectations of other children and of the peer groups they belong to... peers have replaced parents in creating the core of their personalities."

    Chapter 1, pg 11
    "An even scarier thought is that if peers have replaced adults as the ones who matter most, what is missing in those peer relationships is going to have the most profound impact."

    So, I ask you, when we think about this, what is going to be missing?

  • #2
    Unconditional love.


    • #3
      dead on, b_light! i'd also include safety. safety to be yourself, to explore w/boundaries, to make mistakes. and also guidance. among peers it is often the blind leading the blind. w/out adult guidance, they quickly lose their way. this concept always leads me to thinking about Lord of the Flies. scary!


      • #4
        Unconditional acceptance also. I think there would be constant uncertainty and any deviant from the peer society would not be tolerated.

        Its like the blind leading the blind.


        • #5
          Its like the blind leading the blind.
          This is exactly how I felt at that age, I barely remember spending time with my mother (single mom, worked a lot) or even meeting any of my cohorts parents. I was desperately searching for something--understanding, company, love, attention!
          The most calming girl, lived near me and spent a lot of time with her family, but I think I seemed to needy. Her house had such a nice loving environment--too bad we didn't 'click' as friends. (5-6th grade)


          • #6
            I second unconditional love, acceptance for who they are, wisdom, experience, safety


            • #7
              been thinking about this a little more and want to add WISDOM. although i want to be careful w/throwing this out there b/c my children often offer a lot of wisdom to me, just b/c they're little doesn't mean that don't have lots to offer, but there is some that can only be come by experience and age.


              • #8
                definitely unconditional love.