We just finished reading the book by Barbara and Lysa, Attached at the Heart. It was a wonderful read and even more exciting that we'll be able to chat with them this week about what we have read. Now we have the opportunity to read another book which is Connection Parenting by Pam Leo. If you haven't purchased your copy yet please navigate to our store. I do highly recommend the audio CD as well for those of you who do not have the time to read regularly as well as use it as a way to share information between various family members in a one-hour time frame.
A wonderful quote from Pam Leo that will help get you started into wanting to read is her quote: "The level of cooperation parents get from their children is usually equal to the level of connection children feel with their parents."
The gist of the book is (taken from her website):
What is Connection Parenting? "Connection parenting is parenting through connection instead of coercion, through love instead of fear."
Both authoritarian parenting and permissive parenting are reactive. Connection parenting is proactive. Rather than focusing on ways to discipline children when their feelings of disconnection result in uncooperative or unacceptable behavior, Connection Parenting focuses on ways to maintain and increase the parent-child bond/connection.
Connection parenting is an ideal, a navigation star we can look to for guidance. Whenever we question how to respond to a child we can ask ourselves, will this response create a connection or a disconnection. We feel connected when we feel listened to and loved. We feel disconnected when we feel hurt and unheard.
Sometimes a child's behavior will push our buttons and we react rather than respond. As soon as we realize we have created a disconnect, we can reconnect by doing the following:
- Rewind - Acknowledge we have said or done something hurtful
- Repair - Apologize and ask for forgiveness
- Replay - Respond with love and listening
I look forward to reading with you!