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oohh my aching head

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  • oohh my aching head

    my head is spinning this week with my sons therapy.

    My son's pragmatics are blatantly off ...the therapists are really making this an issue and asking what I do or have tried to help him come into awareness more of this. They know this is part of his AS but they seem to want to "fix it." We have talked about him just not being wired to do these skills. The get that, I think, but they still seem to want to fix it.

    They are constant with him in requesting him "say please- say thank you- talk quieter -you are asking rudely..."

    It seems as though he has a mental block in this area as when I do try to address this with him he shuts down.

    It does not matter how much prompting I do before we go somewhere/see someone, it is all lost in a matter of minutes when we step foot into the new environment.

    Or he gets one "Hi how are you.." and then goes right into his interest at the time or in the case of therapy "what are we going to do today (very loudly) "can we do this?" " I wanna do this!"

    Never reciprocal conversation ever or even hearing the answer to hi how are you.

    I am at a loss as to what to do to help this situation.
    I talk talk talk and model model model so much that my 4 year old has it down to a T. She gets more out of our social studies than my son.

    I love my son and this is just who he is. I am hoping it will get better as he gets older.

  • #2
    I think it will get better as he gets older. My husband (very, very likely Aspergic) told me that once he hit high school he was able to talk more socially. Of course if it is about politics or computers he'll go on and on.

    What are his therapy goals with regards to pragmatics? That may be why the therapists are trying to "fix" it. I know that with Alexander's therapies (play, occupational, etc) that he had a difficult time taking what he learned in therapy and applying it to real world situations. Practice makes perfect though.

    I totally feel you on the shutting down thing - that is Alex. *poof* Once he shuts down I know its over. I'd keep doing what you are doing - just model, model, model. Strike a pose! *wink*

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    • #3
      Originally posted by melissa_h View Post
      What are his therapy goals with regards to pragmatics? That may be why the therapists are trying to "fix" it. I know that with Alexander's therapies (play, occupational, etc) that he had a difficult time taking what he learned in therapy and applying it to real world situations. Practice makes perfect though.
      Those goals were never discussed initially.
      It was just a focus on his vestibular issues and his sensory issues in his mouth.
      But as they have been working (we are on like our 6th week with him at this office) with him and his pragmatics are not there, it is like they now recognize this and want to work on it too..
      I know they are talking amongst each therapist about it, b/c the one day I heard my ST tell the PT that he was very pleasant to work with today as she exchanged him to her after she was done. I think when she turned around and realized I was still sitting there after she said that she was like oops.....

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      • #4
        traci,
        if he is there for OT or PT, then pragmatic use of language should not be a goal. however, speech would be different and you could work w/the therapist to come up w/ simple, measurable goals. i would focus on ONE at a time. for instance, voice volume. only focus on volume pre-, during, and post- therapy. only prompt for volume, don't correct anything else, forget the politeness, everything else. give him all the time he needs to master this skill before you move on to the next.

        also, if you don't require him to say please or thank you, then the therapists shouldn't either. and them just telling him he's being rude gives him no information and will never be corrected. see if they will use NVC, "when you asked me that question, i felt uncomfortable, because that is private to me", etc, etc.

        and, ditto melissa, this will take time! try to pamper yourself along the way

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        • #5
          Hmm, I thought for sure he'd have been in speech if the therapist is concerned about pragmatics. My son refused to say please/thank you and we don't require it (you know the whole sincerity thing hehe) and his OT was fine with it and never required it.

          Ditto Dedra - one goal at a time. I wish my kids cared about voice volume - I'm auditorily defensive and loud noises ruffle my feathers and I have two non-regulated loud kiddos hehe. I think I'm going to borrow their ear muffs for myself!

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