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3 year old wants my undivided attention!

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  • 3 year old wants my undivided attention!

    I have a wonderful 3 year old daughter and a baby boy on the way due in October. I was in a car accident when I was 12 weeks pregnant with this pregnancy and have been in some kind of pain since then (headaches, neck, shoulder, back). I have been receiving chiropractic treatment since the accident and they have helped me with my headaches, shoulder & neck pain but my back is still an issue. They are not sure if its from the pregnancy or the accident. Any how I am feeling completely guilty, I only have a two months left to spend with my daughter before our son is born and I am always either tired or hurting. Its like I can't wait to have this baby in hopes to have some pain relief and possible some energy back but I'm also extremely anxious about my daughter not getting me all to herself. We still co sleep and I have anxieties about how to manage a newborn and her in the same bed. She is an extremely light sleeper and wakes anytime I do so is the baby going to keep her up all night? We have been extremely attached since the day she was born. She is a very loving and out going girl but likes to be around others and when I am around she wants all my attention. The past month or so I have been getting irritated because all she wants is my attention when I get home from work. I understand she wants some mommy time but I am so exhausted, uncomfortable, and in pain when I get home I just want to rest! This is just not fair to her but I don't know how to deal. She also interferes when I am trying to talk to my husband...she wants me all to herself! How will it be when the baby comes? Any suggestions?

  • #2
    transitioning from 1 to 2 children gives many parents anxiety. but i assure you, many of us have done it and it is quite a natural process. everything will work itself out. you will continue to be as sensitive and responsive to both of your children as you can and they will adjust. that's not to say that it won't take time, but you will renegotiate your lives as a family of 4.

    part of what your daughter is going thru is developmental, and i'm sure that the anticipation of a new baby has her feeling a little off. she's probably looking to you for reassurance that everything is going to be okay. take time to listen to her fears, don't dismiss them, but reassure her that you will always be there for her. this is also a really good time to enlist your dh to put some extra work into his relationship w/her. that way, when you are with the baby, she'll be used to being cared for by dad.

    does this help? let us know if you have more ?s.


    • #3
      Thank you for some encouraging words. DH has been playing a bigger role in her life now that he is not working and I am working full time and they have gotten a lot closer. But I think because she is with him all day and then when I come home she only wants me. You are right, I'm sure that the anticipation of the new baby has got her out of sorts. We are "nesting" too and she sees/feels that. Thanks again...I will probably have more questions at some point.