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date night/what do you do?

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  • date night/what do you do?

    nak

    with trying to maintain balance in our relationship dh and i have date night where after kids go to sleep, we sneak away & watch a movie, either one we own or rent one, play a game or just talk. we have a special treat and drink like decaf pop or non-alcoholic wine that we normally don't have. we started marking the dates on calendar as priority but since new baby we haven't had but a couple date nights b/c we are too tired and baby comes first.

    btw: this is not sexual in nature, it's a way for us to reconnect emotionally, mentally, etc. w/o LOs always interupting, except Elijah usually has to join us but at least he can quitely join us (by nursing)

    what does everyone else do to reconnect w/ their partner?

  • #2
    That sounds very much like what we do too. We have weekend date nights and I look forward to them every week.

    The only difference is that we have wine

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    • #3
      This sounds like a wonderful idea. Lately, I've been falling asleep early with kiddo and she's waking early, so we have no time when she is asleep! I will talk to my husband about this idea - maybe I could give him permission to wake me up once a week so we can make time together! It's hard to find time together...

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      • #4
        We do living-room picnics after our son falls asleep. Movie are good too

        Recently we had a "cleaning date". Sounds odd, I'm sure--but we both loved it! My mother-in-law (who we see almost daily) watched our son for a few hours at her house one evening. We deep-cleaned a few rooms while carrying on a loose conversation. In the middle we stopped for dinner. It COMPLETELY renewed us! But then again, we both enjoy cleaning But seriously, the effects of this date had us both glowing for a week or so

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        • #5
          we actually started paying a babysitter to come in every other tuesday nite. we go out for dinner sometimes, sometimes just coffee, but very often end up at Target , shopping w/out kids is soooo much easier. staying up past bedtime is just not possible for us. we're too wiped out. we made some financial sacrifices in other areas to be able to afford it, but as a friend told me, it's cheaper than a divorce!

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          • #6
            We do something together every night DH is home. He's a pilot so he's home about 3-4 nights a week. And we are night owls so our son goes to bed around 8-9 and we're up until midnight or 1am. So we have plenty of time to hang out. We usually watch a movie or our favorite tv shows together while we cuddle on the couch. And recently we've spent a lot of time playing rock band together.

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            • #7
              I love date night ... although since having our DD (9 wks old), we haven't had any time together without the LOs. Usually we do a similar thing where we talk or watch something that we can discuss together (eg. rearing kids special etc). When DD stops b/feeding so much, we'll head out to dinner with my parents watching the kids (DS was 9 mths old as he b/fed so much, I could never leave him for more than an hour )

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              • #8
                I love all these ideas and inspires me to follow-through on date-night with my husband. What a change in attitude for myself and my husband when we can find the time to connect over pillow-talk for even 1/2 hour.

                Great topic!

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                • #9
                  We did the same thing. We did a movie and cleaning date in our house.

                  We are here alone. We have no family other than my daughter, so we don't go out without child, but we are happy with that. We have dates in our yard, garden and wherever. Making alone time is what is important, although we haven't had that much of it lately. This thread is reminding me to do something special after little one goes bed this week.

                  Jo


                  Originally posted by b_light View Post
                  We do living-room picnics after our son falls asleep. Movie are good too

                  Recently we had a "cleaning date". Sounds odd, I'm sure--but we both loved it! My mother-in-law (who we see almost daily) watched our son for a few hours at her house one evening. We deep-cleaned a few rooms while carrying on a loose conversation. In the middle we stopped for dinner. It COMPLETELY renewed us! But then again, we both enjoy cleaning But seriously, the effects of this date had us both glowing for a week or so

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                  • #10
                    We're members of a babysitting co-op, and now that our kids sleep pretty reliably between 8:30 and midnight (that is, we can reasonably expect that both of them will be asleep by 8:30 and that neither will wake up again before midnight), we've been able to leave the house for dates a couple of times.

                    We certainly enjoy "date nights" at home, but there is something special about leaving the house and going somewhere else, especially now that we have more than one child. Somehow we didn't miss it so much when we only had one.

                    Quite a number of the babysitting gigs in this co-op are like this, where you go over to the other person's house after their kids are asleep and they hopefully get back before the kids wake up. I find this provides relaxing "alone time" for me, too!

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                    • #11
                      Liam stays with my ILs one evening a month and is starting to stay with my mom one weekend a month. He's eating his grandparent time up!

                      When we had a little extra money, we'd go get a bite to eat. Maybe see a movie or visit childless friends. Now, we just stay home. Watch a Netflix movie, enjoy the peace and quiet. We might do a small household project then just relax. Not much of a date, but exactly what we need (and can afford).

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                      • #12
                        Date night- no sex? really?

                        I can't figure out why thinking that one might need a date night to have sex is a bad thing or less important. Foregoing sex on date night intentionally sounds like a recipe for marriage disaster of epic proportions. It could be hard doing AP as a single parent. Mommies and daddies having sex is as important to our bonding as parents and children being together bonding, isn't it? Did one get ruled out completely in favor of another? Are we suggesting that AP is about forsaking sexual relations? It sounds like a good excuse for people who don't want sex anyway but I don't think it has to be an "either/or" situation. Sorry if this seems like a diversion from topic. It just seemed like the initial post was kind of down playing (or afraid to mention) the importance of sex to a relationship by saying date night wasn't about that. This is my first forum post, I'm new here. Probably started by saying all the wrong things. Hopefully, I'll be given some slack.

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