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  • Nightime safety

    So i've got it so my dd can stay alseep in the the bed while i make a quick trip to the loo at nighttime. However now we've moved to the family bed upstairs (we had been sleeping in the livingroom on a twin matress with a wall at the foot of the bed and on the left side, a guardrail on the other side and a couch at the top) however the only saftey device on the family bed is a bedrail on my side of the bed, and a wall at the top of the bed. We've got it as low to the floor as we can. however i have reflux so the head of the bed needs to be jacked up 6 inches and therefor i need the the box spring. I'm wondering if there are other ways i can keep her safe while i run downstairs to use the bathroom. I have a blanket box i can put at the bottom to help her from slipping off the bottom. My husband works shift work so every 6 weeks there will be a two week period where i'm alone at night. I don't know whether i should raise my bed to the hight of her crib so that i can just slide her in there, or leave it low to the floor. How do you other mom's keep you little one safe when you make a run to the loo? (I'm not sure if i've explained myself very well if you need more info let me know, I would like to continue using the family bed until she's about two)

  • #2
    i'm not sure i exactly of your setup, i think i understand, but it seems pretty safe from what you describe. are you concerned about her rolling off the foot? can you lay extra pillows all around the bed? couch cushions maybe?

    i have heard of moms who bring a child potty into their bedroom so if they need to, they can use that so they don't have to leave the room.

    as far as the family bed goes, why not leave it open? don't put a limit on it. let your child decide when and if she's ready to leave, but when she does, let her know it's always an option for her. my 5 year old chose to have his own bed a few years ago, but there are still many nights when he comes and crawls in between us. i love those times, b/c it's his choice, he's vocalizing his needs for nighttime snuggles. there are many times when i miss his warm body next to mine and it's sort of a comfort that he misses me, too.

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    • #3
      I have a few questions.....
      Does she wake often if you are not in the bed with you?
      If she did wake up what would she normally do? Cry for you immediately? Climb around silently? What is her normal behavior?
      Could you keep an ear on her by a well set up monitor so you would hear if she stirred?

      When I was heavily pregnant and babysitting, I didn't want to run upstairs (to the only bathroom) every 1/2 hr and leave the children alone, so I would use the baby potty in the kitchen (out of sight of the kids of course.)
      That was a good solution for me for that problem.
      For my son right now, I do the hyper set up sensitive monitor to hear if he moves! He is 24 months.

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      • #4
        she does a bit of both. Sometimes she cries for me, usually at the beggining of the night. Later in the night closer to morning she tends to crawl around silently. She tends to stir as soon as i leave the bed. It all depends on how long i can hold my bladder to nurse her back to a sound sleep I could keep an ear on her i have a good monitor. But my mom was telling me that our bed is not safe and that i would be surprised at how quick she can move. She hasn't quite got the hang of crawling. She gets up on her knees but doesn't know how to move her hand and tends to inch backwards. Given enough time she can get down to the end of the bed. So now i'm really worried about her falling out. I thought about pillows around the bed but my mom felt that it would be a fire hazard for several reasons: if i'm attempting to get out of the bed in a hurry i could trip and secondly the only place we could put the bed is on the only heating vent in our house so it would trap a lot of heat under the bed, we could close it but we would have no heat upstairs. If i raise the bed up to let the heat out it will be even more of a danger to her but i could slide the crib against the bed for her. I guess i'm just unsure about what will be best for us

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        • #5
          You mom sounds like a super-professional worrier! I am sure she is a lovely woman, but I could see how her perceptions might make you extra anxious!
          Does your mom just want you to get a crib and stop this co-sleeping idea, or is she supportive but naturally cautious?
          Would you like the absolutely safest co-sleeping situation regardless of other concerns? That would be the mattress on the floor without any other peices of furniture around it. You mentioned a slight rise in your bed. Is there another option for arranging that? Could you have another mattress on the floor for laying with her for part of the night?

          Do you light candles or smoke in your bedroom? The fire hazard thing is a bit of an excessive worry item, I think, unless you don't do the above.

          I have to go... kids need me.... Good luck with that.

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          • #6
            I have reflux also. What we did was get a bed from Ikea that was basically a box on legs. (European style beds seem to be much lower and not have a box spring.) We got the shortest legs possible as the bed allowed us to change the legs. We decided however that we could get them shorter so we sawed them down to a couple of inches. I think it was this bed or at least something similar:
            http://www.ikea.com/ca/en/catalog/products/40120595

            If the link doesn't work it's the EINA bed.

            We placed it in a corner and raised it on some 4 x4's. Padded the top well with towels where the angle of the bed caused a gap between the head of the bed and the wall. We also padded all the way around the wooden frame with foam so he couldn't crack his head on it.

            I think it was fairly safe but he wasn't a newborn when we did this. Maybe 8 months? There's more details I could give you if you want but this is the general gist.

            Wow, the things we do for our kids.

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            • #7
              Jessica, that sounds like a great solution.
              I also have an Ikea bed and like its lowness to the ground.

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              • #8
                Wow this is great! thanks. I've got another question for you mama's. I tried using her potty last night but it's not going to work. I fill it in about 2 pee's. Everytime i left the room to use the bathroom downstairs (which it looks like i'm going to have to do) my dd screamed her head off. No matter what my dh did to comfort her she cried, she seemed almost inconsolable to him. It did sometimes take me awhile to calm down (she just had 2 teeth break through). When he's on midnights will it be ok to let her cry while i run quickly to the bathroom?? I'll try seeing if any of her toys can calm her while i'm out (some soft musical ones). Did you have this problem what do you do?? How did you deal with seperation anxiety??

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                • #9
                  Stupid bladders! Why can't they wait!...
                  Well you could always get a chamber pot to hold more LOL
                  Thats what they did in the olden days....

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                  • #10
                    [quote=smurfsammy;17794]When he's on midnights will it be ok to let her cry while i run quickly to the bathroom?? quote]

                    i'm not sure you have a lot of other options. you HAVE to pee! it's not like you're saying, hey, sorry, kid i'm going to go down a few chocolate bars, take care of yourself till i get back
                    AP is about balance, your needs and your child's. whether or not to pee isn't even in the realm of CIO.

                    one other thing, if she is fully waking and crying so long while you go to the bathroom, could you just take her w/you?

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                    • #11
                      i would take her to the loo with me but i'm afraid to. A few months ago when we first moved to this house and i was running up and down i missed a step and fell down the steps with my dd. luckly she wasn't hurt and all i had wrong with me was some badly scraped knees but now i'm worried about falling howerver now i wear her in a wrap so my arms are free and i turn on the lights so i can see....maybe i just need to work on my confidence. lol...it doesn't help my worry wart mom is encouraging this fear

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                      • #12
                        Sometimes I just HAVE to go also and go as quickly as I can... Its usually in the middle of a long nurse back to sleep session and I would keep waiting and waiting for him to let me de-latch...... So eventually I just decide to go pee so I can then devote my full energy to his nursing.... Sometimes he is very upset with me, but it dosn't happen very often.

                        In your situation I would explore the peeing pot thing especially when hubby is on night shift.... but then again I have no idea how far away your bathroom is or how your bedroom is really.

                        I have been know to put an asleep baby in a bucket seat and then carry them to another area of the house... so they stay asleep and then I could do another 'not safe to hold baby at the same time' activity.... not all the time, just in a pinch----logistical issues and creative thinking AHHHH!

                        You might want to introduce a music box tune to play as a soothing sleep thing... (and I say that because then you never need electricity and can bring it with you...)
                        Play it when you nurse her to sleep for a few days and other sleepy cuddly times and then you could re-start it when you go to the potty for those times.
                        Just an idea for comfort in your absense...
                        Keep trying ideas....

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                        • #13
                          so my other question is about dressers. i'm not worried about her pulling out clothes but i don't want her climbing up the dressers. in her room or mine. Should i put child locks on them?? (we have no closets in our rental unit so we have lots of dressers)

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                          • #14
                            you can buy anchors for dressers. they sell them in baby safety sections of stores. they anchor the dresser to the wall.

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