My name is Missy and I am Mom to Cate. She will turn 1 on Sunday! Let me tell you a little backstory and then I'll address what I need help with. I went back to work full time when she was 13 weeks old. That was just way too hard on both of us, so after about 6 weeks, I dropped to 4 days a week. It has helped, although I wish I was able to stay home full time, unfortunately financially that is not possible right now. We do have a plan in action that would allow me to only work 2 days a week. We have our house on the market and hope to sell it and downsize to a smaller home so we can afford for me to stay home more.
In the mean time, I work 6:45-3:30 on M, T, Th, Fr. On Mondays, Cate stays with my mom. On Fridays, she's with my sister, and on Tuesdays and Thursdays, she is in a Mother's Day Out at a church. My husband works 9:30-6:15. Our schedule is that Josh (DH) drops Cate off at 9, and then I pick her up at 3:45, so she isn't in someone else's care ALL day. On Mondays and Fridays, I am able to go see her on my lunch hour and nurse her.
My problem is her nap schedule. We have shared a family bed since she was about 4.5 months old. I love sleeping next to her, especially since I don't get to spend all day with her. I do NOT want to stop co-sleeping and get teary eyed even thinking about that. My husband loves it too, and is very supportive. But, her naps. Oh, her naps! Currently, she gets about 20-30 minutes in the morning on the drive to wherever she is staying for the day, and then about 30 minutes to 45 minutes after lunch, and then another 15-30 minutes in the car ride home. Some days, though, she doesn't sleep in the car at all and so will only get about 30-45 minutes of daytime sleep.
We put her down at about 7:45 PM and she usually sleeps until 7:30ish in the morning. She nurses frequently at night, but again, I'm okay with this and enjoy it. At bedtime and naptime (when she's at home) we bounce her to sleep on an exercise ball. I'd love to see the end of that ball, but that's a whole other issue.
I just don't think she's getting enough daytime sleep. She often seems tired. She is mostly happy though and does not have nighttime meltdowns. On weekends and Wednesdays, she naps with me or my husband. With me, she won't sleep longer than 30-45 minutes, but for some reason, she'll sleep an hour or sometimes even longer with my husband.
Any thoughts or suggestions for getting her to nap longer during the day? My sister has occasionally let her cry a little and she has about half of those times gone back to sleep for a little longer. I don't really want to go that route. I know a big part of the problem is that her daytime routines are so different every day, but for right now, there's no changing that.
Sorry this is so long, but I just discovered these forums. I've been feeling pretty lonely in my parenting style (not knowing it had a name, organization, etc). Thanks for any support or suggestions you might have!