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I might go crazy...

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  • I might go crazy...

    My 20 month old is a very challenging high needs child. By far, the biggest issue has always been sleeeeeep. We are mostly past constant night waking, but now I am having a new issue. Actually, it is not even close to new, but it is starting to really bother me. If I count up the time I am spending actively trying to get him to go to sleep, it is probably 4-5 hours/day which includes bedtime plus one nap. Lately, he's been skipping out on his naps entirely, but still not sleeping. For instance, Wednesday night slept 8 hours, and then WOULD not go to bed until 11 pm last night and that is after not napping either.

    I lay down with him in our bed and try to cuddle, recite books, sing quiet songs, etc. This has to be done or else he'll fight relentlessly to get out of bed. Many times, that doesn't work, so I end up holding him in a chair where it is tougher to get down. Sometimes I put him in his crib, and he will play sometimes for over an hour in the pitch black before wanting me.

    Singing doesn't work. Not singing doesn't work. Rocking doesn't work. Not rocking doesn't work. Being with me doesn't work. Not being with me doesn't work. Starting to put him to sleep when he's not totally exhausted doesn't work. Waiting until he is overly tired doesn't work. Skipping naps doesn't work. Having a nap doesn't work. I'm sure you're getting the picture. He is overly tired and super crabby all. the. time. He is clearly not getting enough sleep and I have literally tried everything. I am ready to tear my hair out! I am finding it unacceptable to have to be spending this much time trying to get him down to sleep. Help!!!! I need some AP minded ideas for something else to try. My blood pressure is really starting to raise spending so much time trying to get him down!

  • #2

    Have you thought about food allergies? Enviromental stimulants? ANythingelse that could have an exciteable effect on him?

    How is he otherwise? Pretty predictable, eating well, not overly grumpy?

    I want to make sure that there is not something 'extra' creating this behavior. If you have ruled out everything, what is left is just manipulating his need for sleep and finding what sleep cues he does have.
    If you went about your day and never intentionaly 'put' him to sleep what would happen? How about at night? It does seem that your attempts at 'putting' him asleep are not working. Can you list times he has fallen asleep without you (or someone else) intentionaly putting him down? In front of a TV, in the car or some other place? That might be a hint to a direction.
    Waiting until he is overly tired doesn't work. Skipping naps doesn't work. Having a nap doesn't work.
    So what happens? Is he just UP? Forever? Does he act exausted? I would really look into the other stuff I mentioned (food, chemical exposures etc).

    Do you have someone who can help you out during the day?

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    • #3
      He's a tough kiddo. He does have at least one food allergy and perhaps more? It really just seems like he hates going to sleep because he doesn't want the fun to end. Yes he gets verrrrrrry grumpy. He seems to have some sensory issues going on and we are working with an OT.

      And yes, he is practically up forever!! I am serious with the 5 hours/day of trying to get him to sleep and he is still sleeping less than "suggested" by the drs. He doesn't ever fall asleep in the places you mentioned...never with TV, or even in the car! He requires us putting him to sleep and being right by him and even that takes for.ev.er.

      *sigh*.....I am at a total loss...

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      • #4
        When you put him to sleep when does he finally 'let go' and fall into sleep?

        What are his allergies so far?

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        • #5
          hi! I just joined in search of an answer to this very problem! Emily is 23 months old, and in the last 2 months or so is just refusing to sleep. Napping was always an issue. She screams and cries bloody murder, but she will fall asleep most of the time within 30 minutes. But the fighting for it kills me...we have to basically hold her down so she cant get away. Night time is better..in a different way it's worse. We have a routine set, but it's taking up to 2 hour for her to go to sleep. We lay down with her and everything. She just wont sleep!!!

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