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Absolutely SICK of people questioning my parenting skills!

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  • Absolutely SICK of people questioning my parenting skills!

    My daughter and I have been co-sleeping since she's been born (2 days old and still in the hospital, in fact). One of the main reasons we ended up co-sleeping was because she was so attached to her food source when I was breastfeeding. I was nervous about it at first, but then I practiced safe co-sleeping and we started to enjoy it. She will be 8 months on Wednesday and still co-sleeps with me part of the night. The problem is, people continuously question my ability to parent my child because of co-sleeping giving me all of their opinions and trying to force them upon me. How do I blatantly tell people that I am comfortable with co-sleeping with my child and also, and more importantly, when it doesn't become enjoyable anymore, how do we start the process of getting her in the crib? Someone please help!

  • #2
    It might be helpful to have a few "standard" comments to reply to well-meaning friends and family. Such as, if they ask how the nighttime/ sleeping is going, "She sleeps fine, thank you for asking!" Or, "We're both doing great, thanks!" It sounds like you're not wanting to get into any arguments with people, or trying to prove your point, which is good. Try to find a comment that will satisfy their question while making it clear that you're moving on to the next topic!

    And as for transitioning out of the bed...wait until it's relevant. As long as it's working for everyone right now, just go with it. You don't know what age she'll be transitioning out, and that might make a difference in how you approach it, so for now just go with what works!


    • #3
      i agree with kelly on both counts. as for sleeping, no need to make plans, just follow your child's cues. neither of my children ever slept in a crib. they went straight from our mattress to their twin beds, when they were ready.


      • #4
        I was there once

        You will always know your baby better than anyone else and I think you will know when it's time to move away from co-sleeping. I havent made it a fight, with either my children... they have moved to sleeping independently sometime after 2 and after they weaned. I think people think that their way is the only way. McKenna's website is the place I go whenever I need to be reaffirmed. Just go with your heart and dont worry about other people.


        • #5
          My response was always she's a great sleeper were doing great. They didn't need to know where she was sleeping, just that it worked for us. And if people really pressed, I opted for the I'm lazy approach I don't want to get out of bed to make sure she's okay. Not always the best because that one can bring on the cry-it-out nonsense.

          As for their own bed I'm going to have to agree with every one else. They just do it on their own. My 17mo. old transitioned to her own bed at 14mo. when we bought a King size for our room, she didn't like the new mattress so she followed the old mattress into her own room. It's working great. She comes back to our bed when she wakes up usually around 1 to 3 and stays there until she wakes up for the morning. There was no fuss or fight about it and it was all her she just led me into the guest room with the bed she was used to one night.


          • #6
            I am a control freak and tend to over-plan everything - i'ts been a hard lesson for me that kids transition best on their own terms. The arrangement just stops working for us (whether it's sleeping, eating, daily routine, etc...) and then we find a new groove. That just seems to be how it happens for us, I'll bet it's that way for you as well if you just let it happen.


            • #7

              follow your heart... its YOUR life, YOUR child that chose YOU as her mama...


              • #8
                Man do I feel your pain!!! My 16 month old and I still cosleep and everyone and their grandmother has something to say about it. Other than my obnoxious in-laws who's opinion really doesnt matter to me anyway, most people have actually left me alone about it now. My response to people was that "according to Dr. Phil 60% of parents co sleep with their kids", or that 'lots of other parents do it and just because they didnt do it doesnt make it wrong". Its a real piss off but you just have to learn to ignore peoples comments and find other people that DO support you. Hearing about others doing the same thing you are and going through the same things makes you feel sane when you start to believe all the nay sayers might be right...just for that breif second. Just do your own thing and know that you are providing the best for YOUR childs needs and who cares what they think!