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daycare...CIO upon waking from naps :O(

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  • daycare...CIO upon waking from naps :O(

    not so sure how i feel about this...well, i DO know how i feel about it. but knowing what is best in the long run for my son is another question...

    here's what's up... my son has been going to a daycare which is very child-led & he loves it there. it makes it so much easier for me to work f/t knowing he is so happy & cared for...

    BUT...

    when my son wakes from napping there he usually cries...this is just his thing since birth...he gets disoriented or something... at home, i nurse him if he asks for it... but at daycare, he is being told that when he calms down, he can get up...or maybe that they will then hold him...not sure exactly what he needs to calm down about but they let him work it out himself, basically.

    he is used to my nursing him as needed...& my mom, his sis & i responding as quickly as we are able to his cries/needs...esp upon waking when i'm not in bed w/ him...

    this is upsetting to me... my heart is breaking...

    i think this is way young for such a little guy to be pressured into. i'd rather he be comforted by touch...that he is held...like i said, he's just a little guy... it isn't like he is 5 or 7 but even so, i wouldn't just tell my 7.5 y/o daughter that when she calms down from crying & reaching out then she can get up or i will comfort her...!!!

    just wanting to know what other parents here think of this... i'm all for teaching kids to be" self relian"t & such, not growing up thinking they are entitled but for petes sake, loving one another is what life truly should be about...and to me, this doesn't feel good.

    input? thanks.

  • #2
    I can understand how this would be hard for you....my main concern when choosing a daycare for my DS was finding someone that understood and would work with his sleeping habits (he only goes to sleep when nursed/rocked). In my opinion, letting a child sit and cry and refusing to pick him up until he calms down doesn't really sound like a very child friendly approach. I totally appreciate that it is difficult for daycare workers to tend to every child's needs immediately (I am a teacher, so I know the difficulty of having to respond to many children at once!), but to respond, or rather not respond, to your child in the way that you described would certainly not sit well with me.

    Have you discussed your feelings/concerns with your daycare provider? Are they willing to respond more sensitively to your son's needs?

    BTW, how old is your son?

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    • #3
      I'm so sorry, I would have a very hard time with that as well. I would talk to the daycare providers about your concerns. If they are unwilling to work with you on this, you might want to start looking for a new daycare. Hopefully they will understand where you are coming from, and will be accommodating of your family values.

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      • #4
        I run a day care from my home and I never let any of the children CIO apon waking. Actually quite the opposite! As soon as they're awake they are removed from their play pens. If they need a little extra snuggling (ie woke up crying) they get it unless their is another child who needs removed from their play pen. But i always offer myself back to the previos child if they need it. However all the children sleep in the same room. If one wakes up crying I'm removing them not only for their needs but so they don't wake up the others.

        I would definatly talk to your day care provider. If she/he is unwilling to support your requests than maybe look for another babysitter. Personally I feel that it's my responsiblity to give the parents what they request, that's what they're paying me for! Good Luck

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