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fighting the free hand when nursing

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  • fighting the free hand when nursing

    My 18 month old is getting more and more aggressive with his "free" hand when he nurses. He loves twisting and pulling my nipple and also picking at and pulling a mole I have on my side. I really don't like him touching my nipple or my mole and I've been trying to redirect his hand. I have also tried explaining to him when he is in a good mood what I like and don't like and put his hand on other parts of my belly and say "that's nice" or "here is ok but here is not ok".

    However, even in his sleep (we bed share), he is quite forceful and we've been having these really fitful nights (for me, at least) where it feels like I am constantly and quite forcefully pushing his hand away from my nipple and mole (he goes to one, I push his hand away and he moves to the other...repeat repeat repeat!) I don't like treating him that way but I don't know what else to do.

    I'm afraid I'm turing nursing into a frustrating and negative experience for him, when it has been such a wonderful experience for both of us up until now. During the day, when he is awake, I have less problems with him pulling my nipple and mole but at night and most of the time we nurse lying down together, it is quite frustrating for both of us.

    Any advice or tips on this matter?

    Thanks!

  • #2
    My 13 month old DD has recently started pinching my opposite nipple as well. It is the most irritating sensation... and painful too. I try to redirect when she's awake but when she's asleep she's extremely persistent and will eventually just wake up if I keep moving her hand away. I was hoping it was a phase but it's been going on a while now.

    I just found this website with some interesting tips on Kelly Mom. There's actually a name for this. It's called twiddling. Here's the link: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/older-bab...g-manners.html

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    • #3
      11-month old DD also twiddles. DH has told me to 'flick' her hand when she does that while saying NO - I was reluctant to but only had to do it for 2 days, now she doesn't do it anymore and when I find that she does stray, I only have to say 'No' and she gets it. You dont flick very hard, its just to get their attention.
      Last edited by LeoMommy; 07-11-2010, 08:48 AM.

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      • #4
        I saw this a while ago and didn't know if I should respond as we are dealing with the same exact issue. My daughter is 20mo. I am now pregnant so the twiddling makes me beyond insane. So about a week ago I started just firmly telling her one side at a time and keeping my hand over the other nipple. She got hysterical yelling, and screaming, kicking, biting, hitting me. I would tell her she could have numms and she could play with my hair or the strings on my clothes, and I would ask her if she wanted to nurse on the other side, usually she would say yes. After 3 days of this and always giving her the other side when she would ask for it we have no more twiddling and she says okay when I say one side only we are only a week into this but I'm thrilled and the twiddling is all but gone.

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        • #5
          nipple twisting insanity!

          OK, just wrote about this on another thread... had to revisit this, because this is my 'hot button' so to speak and pardon the pun, right now! whoa! its hard Mammas, but I am glad I am not alone of just really horrible for feeling this way, it truly feels annoying and I want nursing to be pleasant and calm and lovely, you know? anyway, kepp on, keeping on, the redirecting does pay off, at least some of the time!

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          • #6
            My 15 month old has been doing this for a while now and all I've been doing is covering my nipple with my free hand. She seems to forget the twiddling until the next feed. I just keep covering it up at every feed, she gives up very quickly no matter how early into the feed I am and doesn't resume. Good luck

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            • #7
              I find wearing a lightly padded nursing bra acts as a barrier and redirecting hand as well.

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