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What did you do for Separation Anxiety

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  • What did you do for Separation Anxiety

    I think that is what is going on here. Separation Anxiety. I'm a first time Mom so this is all new. DD is 19.5 months now. Since she came home from NICU at 2.5 weeks she has been one of those babies who just prefers to always be close to Momma. But it seems to be at new heights these days. Plus her agression is up (starting to hit and pull the clothes of other children) around sharing and she has learned the "MINE" word. I intervene and tell her gentle, we are gentle with our friends and touch her softly and explain that it is so and so's turn then it will be her turn....We are having a hard time sleeping around here. (And for those who have read my other posts know that she goes for an overnight now once a month with her father...which might be part of the reason) She is refusing to take her nap until I come home, which then puts us getting into bed later and later each night. And when she does finally allow herself to fall asleep she is on the neh (her word for breast) for most of the night. So then I'm not getting enough rest (she use to wake just once every 4-5 hours to nurse) and she has started to scream again when it is time to get into her car seat (I've been allowing for car exploration time until she is ready but then she will start screaming and calling for me once we are underway. We stay home alot) She has consitently disliked going in the car since she was an infant, but she had been doing much better until recently.
    Is this "normal" for this age? What more can I do to put her at ease? Her nanny says that when they come home from the park the first thing she does is go around the house looking for me. OUCH. What did you do that worked? Am I missing something?

  • #2
    Oh, you had a NICU baby too! DD was four weeks Preemie, what about yours? Even though your LO is older then mine, we are in the same boat when it comes to Separation Anxiety. Most days I find that putting her in the Moby Wrap is great for her other days she is just happy to be sitting on my lap. But yes this Anxiety is very stressful!

    It sounds like you are doing all that you can, well alI that I have been told to do along the way. I can't really give advise on the agression because I am not there yet, even though DD just learned she can throw things when she get frustrated , I usually take the item away and explain that she can't have it unless we play nice with it. People say I am nuts for explaining because she is only 13 months (guess you can't make everyone happy LOL).

    I am sorry that I can't be any help to you, expect to say your not alone in this, and it's frustrating, and it's soooo hard to be a good AP with times like this. Thank you for posting this, maybe others can get some tips as well!

    Take care


    • #3
      DD was born at week 35, very beginning of week 35 when my water broke. I was not ready and neither was she as we waited for her to come on her own for 8 hours until they finally induced me. Guess that was my first clue she was a mommy's girl! LOL

      I talk to her too and tell her about sharing, I don't think you are starting to early with that. They understand WAY MORE than people think they do. I wonder sometimes if it more my anxiety than hers around the sharing thing. I've heard from some Mom's that they just aren't capable of sharing until they reach 3 or so and then they become very cooperative . Since she has become mobile we don't use the sling as much. We are also in a push me pull me thing which I try to let her control (she pushes me away and then panics and pulls me to her.) Today was a better day, no Nanny today just the two of us. She seems to like it that way....hhmmm, maybe that is the biggest hint of all.
      Last edited by Plumsmum; 05-20-2008, 02:16 PM.