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Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child?

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  • #16
    There is a great book by Jeff VanVonderen called "Families Where Grace is in Place" and he talks at length about what Christ and Paul had to say about parenting. We are commanded not to exasperate our children or cause them to stumble. Spanking certainly does both of these things - I know I felt seething anger toward my folks when they not only spanked, but criticized, put down or whatever. (not that I was spanked much, or treated badly at all) Check it out - it blew me away!

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    • #17
      The very root of a spanking ,regardless of how moderate you do it,is this ,you must beat a child out of love in order to spark a fear in them so hopefully they will be too scared to disobey again. Every thing from a slapping of the hand to full blown out abuse. this is the phylosophy behind it. This idea is in direct contradiction to new testiment ideas. 1 john 4:18 says there is no fear in love:but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment.He that feareth is not made perfect in love. I must point out that fear and respect or two totally different things, such as a fear of God is a respect of God. this is evident in the above scripture. "love casteth out fear" certaintly love does not casteth out respect. One may argue that a child could also fear being grounded . but that is more of a concern or dissappointment, a worry of loosing somehting . it isnt a scarry,"tormenting" type of fear as described in the above verse"because fear hath torment". I can not think of any thing that love and fear has been associated with together other than parenting. 1 john 4:18 seen a need to point out that fear is not associated with love, ever in anyway. "there is no fear in love". the end of the verse states "he that feareth is NOT MADE IN LOVE" children should be made in love so how can one make them in love by striking fear into them."there is no fear in love".

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      • #18
        Funny, cause you know, spanking is not included in the 613 commandments in the Torah. Your friends are mistaken, greatly mistaken. So just know that you are doing the right thing, hang in there, I live in the bible belt and it can be difficult down here when you against the grain.

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        • #19
          when jesus stated to not fear man that can destroy the body but rather fear God that can destroy both the body and soul he was clearly rendering any form of corporal punishmeny useless. what good is corporal punishment if nobody is allowed to fear it? the fear of God in this verse isnt saying to fear God destroring the body ,when man can clearly do that but to fear the destruction of the soul. the fear of God is the fear of loosings ones soul.

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          • #20
            Most people I hear use the word "discipline" in regards to parenting are actually referring to punishment. Of course, this really just means to instill morals in the original meaning of the word but it's come to mean punishment. For this reason I am wondering if you'd please clarify, what do you mean when you say discipline? I am against any kind of punishment... even if you take out the physical aspect, all of the emotional pain is still there. I was physically abused growing up and I know that the emotional aspect hurt just as much as the physical pain - even a "time out" is still going to have that.

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            • #21
              The verses iin pro vervbs that so many peopole love to use to justify there violence against kids is not entended for the new testiment church. WE are under the fulfillment of the law of moses, not the letter of the law of moses. Sure enough the law of moses is genesis-deut. not neccesarily the book of proverbs. however people especially king solomon was living under it. By trying to duplicate solomon's method you are still living under the letter of the law which christ nailed to the cross col. 2:14. We know that solomon's method was not Godly wisdom becouse it contradicts every description of the criteria to be considered Godly wisdom in the new testiment james 3:17 . If you properly understand Hebrews chapter twelve you will seee that there is a comparison being done between the carnal chastisment(violent) that we received from our earthly fathers and spiritual chastisment (non-violent)that we recieve from our heavenly father. In hebrews 12:10 it is comparing the reason for both and it clearly shows that the only one of the two that is profitable to us is that spiritually correction that comes form GOd while that carnal chastisment that comes from our fathers is not for our profit but only feeds the pleasures of those that inflict it. FOr it only SEEMS best to them.

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