I have read Alfie Kohns Unconditional Parenting and we agree with a good portion of what he is saying and want to implement his ideas. It can be hard, when we watch DD do something new to NOT say anything or we'll try to say something descriptive such as "you did it" or "You got the ball in the basket all by yourself!" or "you stacked those blocks high"... I have a couple of ponderings ... if we sound excited "You did it!! " is that a type of praise? i want to show interest and sometimes some of the UP stuff almost comes across to me as too much "hands off" if that makes sense.
Secondly, how do you teach ... for example, we do sign language for DD. So, when she sees a ball and signs ball we usually say "thats right" in moderately happy voice. Is that appropriate ... if not, how do you give feedback on teaching type of things?