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YELLING while in the carseat

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  • YELLING while in the carseat

    My DS is almost 10 months old. He used to ride in his carseat without a problem, sometimes even falling asleep in it. Now he screams- not crying it's more like he's yelling at me. As soon as I take him out he's happy as can be. I've check all the straps ect. to make sure that nothings too tight and it all seems fine.
    I hate to have him so unhappy but sometimes we have to leave the house. Has anyone else dealt with this? is it just a phase? suggestions?
    Thanks!
    Last edited by jcr92901; 04-01-2008, 12:28 PM. Reason: spelling

  • #2
    Oh yes! This is the same for us too. It was the same way with my DD. Both of my kids hated the carseat for a while. I think DD outgrew this somewhere around 16 months. But, right now, my 12 months old still doesn't like the carseat. But, two things have worked to make the trip easier are to feed him (he is breastfed) before a trip and have lots of toys on hand. As he drops a toy, I reach over and give him another one. It's hit and miss, but a full belly and something to entertain him makes the trip a little easier on him.

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    • #3
      Both my children have hated their carseats. To me it really looked like they could not understand why I got so distant, and why they could be so close to me, but not be in my arms. They really could not understand why the car-situation was how it was...

      For both of them it got better when they got carseats where they could sit up a bit, and face forward and look out from the windows. And now they both really enjoy riding in the car.

      What I did when I felt I had to take the car instead of tram/tube/bus in this period was talk-talk-talk. I talked to them about what was happening - "Mamma needs to have her eyes on the road watching the traffic. You need to sit in you seat to keep safe in the car. As soon as we arrive I will hug and kiss you as much as you need..."- and so on, and on...

      I never pushed them to far. I would always stop a number of times even on short trips to reassure them. I took them out of the seat, nursed a bit, and then drove on. I do not believe in "CiO in the car"...

      *Big hug* to you and your DS!

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      • #4
        this is such a hard situation! i have a happy 10 month old car rider right now but when dd1 was a baby she despised the car. she would scream until she threw up if not attended to. i actually wrote the dr. sears website about it, i was so distraught & out of sorts. (i didn't hear back, by the way, so i was left to my own devices).

        anyway, the things we did were *have someone sit in the backseat, whenever possible *arrange car rides after a snooze (because she never fell asleep in the car so at least she was somewhat happier after a little rest) *and lots o' stops. she was so much happier when we turned her around....a little earlier than some would agree but i couldn't take the stress of driving with a screaming child. i also played music, sang, and tried to reassure her that i was right there.

        what about trying a mirror in front of her seat so she can somewhat see you? i didn't have one but all of a sudden it sounds like something i would've tried!

        best of luck to you!

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        • #5
          The only thing that really helped us was for me to sing. It was magic. I'd go through all of the songs we knew and back. If singing couldn't fix it, I'd find a place to pull over and nurse.

          He still likes it if I sing to him in the car, and he's starting to sing as well

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          • #6
            My DD used to be this way (sometimes she still is). Singing was a huge lifesaver for me (though it doesn't work forever and your voice goes horse). We found a children's CD where there are children actually singing the songs. That seemed to make my daughter happier than CD's w/ adults singing children's songs.

            Singing and soft toys (krinkly cloth books were also a favorite).

            Good luck Mama. It is hard to hear your child be so unhappy..

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            • #7
              CarSeat Capers

              Hi. We are experiencing the same but have found what has been suggested in previous posts most effective. Mainly that if Zimmi is dry, feed and ready to nap then the car seat is not as much of a challenge, but we do live 20 minutes from anything. I do talk to him about the 'adventure' the day before and call the carseat the 'Second Mates Chair.' And have been nicely surprised at how turning the seat to forward facing and more upright has helped. Also, I allow for stops and when we stop it is for a nurse and at least fifteen to twenty minutes if he is awake. I found anything less just makes the situation more aggravated. 20 minutes though and he seems ready to try again and usually drifts off to sleep. All the best.

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              • #8
                I just placed the carseat facing forward. I might be breaking safety laws..
                If DS is not in the mood to go,nothing works.
                W drive to pick up my DD every day at 3:05pm. The school is about 15 min away, and DS is fine if he's not tired. It seems that this rutine is ok for him most days.
                I think he's content for the first 10min of the ride, then starts looking for someting to chew on. That's when I pull out my stash of toys' and give him one at a time until there is none left, and by then we either arrived or I can pull over, nurse him, cuddle, and put him back in the seat. It doesn't always work, he gets mad when I put him back in the seat...

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                • #9
                  ha Jess, of course our little one has started doing the same thing lately. We keep trying new things and each seems to work for limited number of trips before she's on to us. We've used the kids cd (good for a couple trips only), singing many times works, but best of all is trying a new car toy (this works most trips). We have this fabric car toy that sits in her lap and sings and lights up with a remote control. I play it and sing along to the songs it plays.

                  I'm thinking it's because she used to sleep a lot in our last seat when the car was moving and now the new one is angled up more and she can't get as comfy. She just doesn't look as comfy in it to me. poor baby, she just HATES being strapped into anything.

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                  • #10
                    Thanks mamas those are some great suggestions I'll have to try

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                    • #11
                      It's really hard. Fortunately, it doesn't take me longer than 10-15 minutes to drive anywhere in town. I nurse my 11mo and play games as I belt him in, then talk to him until we get there. He's hated his car seat(s) since day one. He's only 20 pounds, so I won't be turning him around anytime soon (RF limit in his seat is something like 33 pounds).

                      We walk a lot. And take the bus. It's just easier. I'm not comfortable letting him cry for very long, even if he is safe and attended. None of my errands are so important that they can't wait until someone else can drive.

                      On longer road trips, my partner drives. I sit in back with the babe. The dog rides co-pilot.

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                      • #12
                        This is a major stress for us, too! We also turned our car seat around early - we visited family at Thanksgiving, 2 weeks before her birthday, and had to put the seat in another car, so went ahead and put her forward-facing. That helped, but we still have the problem on occasion.

                        It has required a lot of patience and creativity on our parts - the best game we've found is "stinky shoe" where one of us "rips" her shoe off as she's going in the seat and smells it, then says dramatically "oh, stinky shoe" and makes a swooning look. We do this over and over til she's laughing. It usually helps. Singing and playing helps, and so does patience where we let her stand in the seat for awhile before putting it in.

                        Sometimes nothing helps and we are in a rush and end up putting her in against her will - which we HATE but we just don't know what else to do. And we make sure to talk to her and explain why we need her in the seat and that we understand that she doesn't want to. Not satisfactory to either of us, but we do try our best.

                        It's been a very challenging situation to deal with, but it's immensely rewarding when we find ideas that work to meet all of our needs.

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                        • #13
                          i've found this to be even more difficult w/2 kids. w/just one, you can take your time, allow them to adjust to the car, play for a little bit. but as they get older and your older child has appointments, etc., you lose a lot of your flexibility. ds2 HATES his seat, but if ds1 has to go to school or therapy, we are very limited w/more gentle options.

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