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Baby on the Way

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  • Baby on the Way

    Our second child is due any day now and I'm looking for ANY tips on how to make the transition as easy as possible for our just 3 year old daughter. I think we've got the birth part covered but I'm concerned mostly about how to carry them both (she still wants to be in the sling on occasion) and how to get them both to sleep, and how to make sure that she gets the attention she needs with a newborn around. My husband works 24 hour shifts and starting around 3 weeks I'll have to do bedtime on my own 3-4 times per week. Currently we read books in the rocking chair then lay down in bed together until she falls asleep. I'd appreciate any adivice you have. Even things that you tried that didn't help. Also did anyone's older child feel the impending change and start having significantly more tantrums as birth approached? Thank you! Thank you!
    -Anna Swanberg

  • #2
    Congrats! Hope all goes smoothly with the birth.

    We are due with another one in Aug, I have also been giving these things a lot of thought. One thing that I will be getting organized is a special box of things for when I am feeding the new born. Stuff like books, special toys, stickers etc. This was a tip given to me by a friend with two little ones. Of course getting your older child to be 'mamas helper' is always supposed to be a hit.

    Not sure about what to with carrying both of them. I guess have the baby in a sling and your toddler on your back could work? Would your daughter be into a special baby sling for her to carry her dolls around in? That could get her into the 'big girl' mentality when you are out and about.

    I obviously haven't been there myself so these are all just ideas that I have been thinking of for myself. I am sure you will all find a comfortable place once things get going, our little ones are very resilient and its obvious from your post that you are a caring and thoughtful mother. I am sure that you will find your own way in no time!


    • #3
      Regarding the bedtime issue, I would lay next to my older one while the baby would be quietly nursing.
      I second the big kid on the back, baby on the front idea. By three my son was way to big to be carried often but he wanted my lap at the same time a lot. I would put the baby in a bouncy chair and give the older my full attention for a while. When the baby is napping try to give your oldest direct, clear attention. I found my son missed that after the baby was born. I think he felt like an afterthought. Try to keep him involved in your thoughts and talk about why you want to do things (I am going to change the diaper now because pee-pee on the skin too long might make it sore) on why you have to change it now instead of getting him the toy out of the basement.
      If you haven't already read Siblings Without Rivalry!



      • #4
        we did lots of reading of books about babies and having siblings. we really talked up being a big brother. i was REALLY worried about the effect it would have on my 3yo, but you know what? everything really just came together. i finally realized that siblings are born every day and that it's a natural part of life. it teaches us to 'go w/the flow.'

        of course, dh was around to help out a lot. what we did was trade off, one get one to sleep while the other was w/the opposite child. on the occassions when i had to do it myself, i'd get the baby to sleep first, then my 3yo.


        • #5
          I have heard lots of people talk about a nursing box. I'll be sure to get one stocked up. I envision the sling/backpack combo for longer treks. I'm wondering how on earth I'm going to get from the car inside the grocery store Like you said, we'll figure it out at some point. There may be more than one tear shed but we'll make it


          • #6
            I LOVE the idea of explaining why we need to change babies diaper etc. Libby is very into why right now and I think that will help alot. Siblings without Rivalry is on my list!

            Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I really appreciate them.


            • #7
              Grocery store.... one option.
              Park next to the cart deposit place or someone almost finishing.... deposit child/ carry other child.


              • #8
                I had to face a lot of problem when by second child was born and by first child being just 1 year. It was very difficult for me to manage both children. But I was lucky that I found a nanny here and everything went very smoothly. Just check out I hope it will solve your problem and yur worry too.


                • #9
                  I'm late to this but I think this was a great question. I'm in sort of the same situation right now. I'm due in October and I'm really not sure how to completely prepare my 2 year old (will be 2.5 when this one comes) for the baby.

                  Also we are going to have the unique challenge of navigating college hockey games. We haven't missed one in almost 3 years and DH is a photographer for the team. I'm ready to nurse the infant in a sling and also have a nursing cover but I'm going to be very interested in having a toddler and newborn in this situation!

                  I love the idea of the nursing box. I might have to start getting something like that started soon.