Anyway, my current problem is with my 5yo. He really hates it when I leave him at school. It is heartbreaking to have to walk away whilst he is sobbing and clinging to me, but the longer I stay and the more I try to explain and ease the transistion, the worse it gets. I cannot calm him down and always end up having to leave him in tears in the playground. He is generally fine in the mornings (dressing. breakfast etc)until the actual point when I leave him.
I have a similar problem with him at bedtime. We have a lovely time until I finish the last story. Then he starts calling me names, crying about everything that didn't go his way all day and will not accept any comfort, even being physically agressive to me. This happens even if I try and stay with him and cuddle him (ie not becuase I am actually leaving - although it gets worse when I do try and leave).
My husband thinks I should just put him in bed and walk away. I feel that there is an underlying issue there about separation from me, and the worst thing I could do is withdraw my affection. At the same time I am not willing to sit there indefinitely to be physically and verbally abused.
I should add that the rest of the time he is generally very well behaved, affectionate and self-motivated. Although he does struggle with transitions generally, these can generally be managed by giving him sufficient warning and control over variables (where do you want to put that toy to keep it safe until we get back? etc).
Sorry to go on so, especially in my first post, but I would really appreciate any suggestions on how to deal with this that don't involve leaving him screaming in the playground/bed!
Any suggestions gratefully received.