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Wetting and possible separation anxiety

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  • Wetting and possible separation anxiety

    Last Weds, my DD (21 mos) started Montessori school. When I dropped her off, she cried inconsolably - wouldn't allow anyone to touch or hold her - so they allowed me to sit in the room, which I've done for 3 days.

    On Weds night, she wet the bed for the first time since she was 9 months old. (We've been practicing EC since she was 6 mos old.) I thought she'd had too much water before bed or something, but then she wet her pants the next day at school. She's been out of diapers and in panties for 3 1/2 months and has not wet her pants at all until Thurs. Then she wet again Thurs night.

    I mentioned it to the teacher and she said that she's heard of this for years and that it's very common with this kind of change in a child's life. The more I think about it, the less comfortable I am with this. Just because it is common doesn't mean it's a good thing! (Crying it out is common, but whether it's a good thing is definitely debatable.) I guess what I'm getting from this is that, at some level, Parisa is really disturbed or anxious or is feeling something that is not pleasant. Because we practice AP, I am all about paying attention to (and meeting) her needs - both those expressed directly and those expressed more subtly.

    Montessori school is not a necessary thing for us right now, so I am feeling really ambivalent about sending my DD to school if it is causing her to feel upset, anxious, etc.

    Has anyone else experienced this? Any thoughts or input? I'd be grateful for ideas from other AP moms!

    Last edited by desertpixies; 03-06-2010, 12:00 PM.

  • #2
    You are right. It is common, but because it is common doesn't mean that it is the optimal situation. I think when we as a society start to feel that well everyone gets that stressed and does it, they will get over it, is when we stop making sure each others needs are being met.

    I am homeschooling Ronnie. IF and when he wants to try school it will be completely his choice, but that for many people is not a choice. With my girls I was a single mother so there was no choice, well I think I could have made it work in hindsight, but it was what I knew at the time.

    Your child is so young. She probably really wants to be home with her mama. If you can and want to, then keep her home.

    Peace & Blessings,