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Only one NOT at preschool - help!

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  • Only one NOT at preschool - help!

    I would love some support with what I am going through at the moment! My daughter just won;t settle with anyone but me. We live on a small island in the Caribbean which has many expats. My parents are here also.
    She is an August baby & I have been her main carer since birth. We spend nearly every hour together (co-sleep, BF etc) & only her father is trusted to look after her other than me. I would like to say she is happy with others too but that is not so. My parents are here but even they are not that close to her. She is now 2yr 8 mths. I join in with every activity I can in order to socialise for both of us. We've been going to a community play group twice a week since she was a few months old which she is only now getting more at home in.
    I have found it hard & lonely many times because so many of her contemporaries are in day care all the time & there seems limited opportunities to get togehter with others for individual support. Some weeks I am pleased to say it is a bit easier & there is a littlle more to do - we just started pottery classes for toddlers which we both love!

    My concern & isolation is increasing once again because as September draws nearer nearly every single child her age who was in the community playgroup will be starting preschool. Both my partner & I feel 2-3years old is just too early to be at 'school' or away from the attention of parents for many hours & days at a time. Niether of us is keen on it & frankly my daughter would flip out if she was put in such an environment. There is a good Montessori here but they demand you pay for a full place even if your child only requires a few hours per week.
    I am just seeking to find others to befriend whilst I am standing alone like this! In my ideal world we would not be the only ones holding onto our child but have many other like-minded friends with which to share child-rearing duties with.
    I really do not know what to do because I feel the future extremely challenging for me to keep my daughter interested & happy in her day as well as me sane & happy too! What do others think or suggest? Has anyone delt with this before? How do you keep a 3 yr old busy all by yourself? there really is very little on this island to occupy a child: beach, beach & beach! I am wondering if it will be sufficient to hang out with 1 & 2 year olds in their houses as she is very good with younger ones - the 3 yr olds we know are a pretty rough crowd!
    Any thoughts gratefully read!

  • #2
    have you looked into more structured activities at home? if you're going to start in Montessori, there are some wonderful online resources for bringing those concepts into your home. many of them are inexpensive, create-your-own materials that your daughter will love and pique her interest.


    • #3
      I feel for you, this sounds like such a hard place to be in. My daughter is an October baby so she won't be the right age for preschool until after most of her friends so I know I will have her home until she's almost 5. I think it's great for her to hang out with younger kids, that can be wonderful for her to teach them, and learn some things about herself. As far as being home all day that can be so tough. I know lots of mom's in my area are SAHM's who don't send their kids to preschool till 4 or 5. That would be so hard if I was the only one. I really think the idea of structured activities at home is a life saver. Some days when I just don't have the energy I like to plan out what we will do, like we will start by going to the park, then to the grocery store, then nap, then cook something, then we will play a game, do a craft, or play around the house and then Daddy should be home. It helps to have a few days all planned out knowing you will be flexible with your child's mood. Good Luck.


      • #4

        Thanks for the reply - helps so much to have someone else's picture & experience in my mind.
        Just got back from a trip to the UK so pardon delay in response. Also have jet lag, so pardon shorter-than-I'd-like response!