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Pacifier needed???

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  • Pacifier needed???

    I have always been dead against pacifiers since I would rather my baby form an attachment to me, a person, than a piece of plastic. However, I'm starting to think I might really need to use it for certain situations (I'd never use it as something to "shut up" my crying baby or to just have the baby suck on instead of having human interaction).

    The situations would be...

    1) bedtime, when putting my older child (3.5 years) down. Right now, I have him watching videos by himself while I put baby (6 weeks) down (he goes absolutely ballistic if he sees me nursing her at bedtime and gets violent towards both of us and since my husband works nights, I am totally alone with them.) But I don't really like him watching videos for very long so I'm thinking that if baby has nursed a lot to the point that she is clearly comfort sucking but not falling asleep, that I could give her a pacifier to suck on while I nurse DS to sleep and then go back to nursing her to sleep.

    2) The other instance would be when we are in the car. We live in the mountains and have to drive everywhere, which I hate, but that's the reality. When she cries, I pull over and nurse her and DS, again, goes nuts if he can't get out of the car, which is not always possible. So I'm thinking again, if she nurses to the point of comfort sucking, that again, I could give her a pacifier to keep her happy for the rest of the ride.

    A third instance might be at home when I have to cook dinner, for example. As mentioned before, husband works nights (he is only home for 1-2 hours in the afternoon every day) so I have to cook/clean/do bedtime myself. But if baby wants to comfort suck and I have to get dinner on the table for DS and myself, it is really hard to manage (and I've never been able to work out nursing while she is in a sling or carrier while doing other things like cooking). So again, I'm imagining giving her the pacifier for a little bit while I make dinner.

    Would like to know what other AP parents think about this. Thanks!

  • #2
    I think this is a situation that is very different for every child/family. Both of my sons used them. They seemed to have an intense need to suck, but in different ways. My oldest wanted something to suck, but would get mad when he would suck on me and milk came out. I had so much milk, that he could never just pacify himself, he'd choke and swallow. My second was too busy to nurse for long, so he wanted to be off an playing, but still wanted to suck. I would lay out the pacifier and he would choose whether or not to use it while he was playing w/toys. He almost always had it in his mouth. My experience w/both was that if they wanted to nurse, no pacifier in the world would do. We quickly learned what it was they wanted and responded to their needs, as in all aspects of our relationship.


    • #3
      I am in the same situation with my 6 wk old! He also has a fussy time at night, which of course coincides with my 3.5 yo DS's bedtime, where he wants to suck to sleep, but gets very angry when milk comes out, and then starts to cry and fuss because he becomes overtired. This makes it very hard to get my older son to bed because the baby is keeping him awake. I have considered a soother out of desperation, but haven't yet given in and used one, mainly because I am afraid that it will interfere with BF since he is so young.

      I'm interested to know if you have used one yet, and if so, is it helping??


      • #4
        Trying to introduce it but baby keeps spitting it out! Have heard it takes weeks for the baby to accept...