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Solo Parenting Due to Leaving Abuse and/or Domestic Violence?

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  • Solo Parenting Due to Leaving Abuse and/or Domestic Violence?

    I have parented my DS, almost 5, using AP principles.

    Six months ago, I broke free from an abusive marriage when my husband hurt my son in anger. The abuse was reported to the appropriate authorities and investigated. Prior to that, the abuse was mostly toward me and had been mental, psychological, emotional and verbal. In the time leading up to the separation, my husband's abuse moved towards maltreatment of our son as a way to hurt me, as I had become more skilled at avoiding his abusive maneuvers.

    I am experiencing and learning about unique parenting challenges that come when a child witnesses and/or experiences abuse. Sometimes, it is hard to discern "normal" developmental challenges from the effects of the abuse.

    Our son has mixed feelings. He loves and enjoys spending time with his dad, but also wonders if he will hurt him again.

    I am just wondering if anyone else out there is solo parenting after leaving an abusive relationship who is willing to share their experience or story? Most parents in my domestic violence women's support group do not practice AP, and the group's facilitators are childless and do not seem to really know much about child development.

    My husband is in a one-year domestic violence program for men, and the intent is to see if our marriage can be reconciled. Twice-weekly visitations with our son are supervised by me.

    All visits are amicable. Like many abusers, my husband appears to be Godly, gentle, kind and wonderful in public. I am the only one who has ever seen his abusive side.

    Thanks in advance for anyone who is willing to share!
    Last edited by adventuremom; 10-28-2010, 02:09 AM.
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