Marriage and Attachment Parenting

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you handle it when you and your spouse disagree on your parenting style?

At the end of the day Attachment Parenting is an overall philosophy, a belief about the relationship you want to develop with your children. It is important to talk with your spouse about your parenting goals. Use Non-violent communication to openly discuss your parenting philosophy, concerns, hopes, and goals. Work with your spouse to understand where they are coming from and work together to come up with a plan that will work for everyone in your family. Agree to each remain informed and aware of objective child development.

How do you have sex if your kids are co-sleeping with you?

Sex is an important part of a marriage relationship, and it makes sense that this can become a challenge or concern in co-sleeping families, but AP parents can and do enjoy sexually fulfilling marriages even during their co-sleeping years. There is a wide range of "normal" interest and ability following the birth of a child, but it's common and even expected that sexual desire declines for both men and women in the first few months of parenthood. Many factors cause this dip in intimacy including hormonal changes, changes to the body, exhaustion, the new challenges of parenthood, and more.

Do AP couples ever do things as a couple without their children?

Absolutely. API's principle of Striving for Balance in Personal and Family Life is aimed at reminding parents about the importance of meeting their needs as a couple. Even before you're ready for that initial separation, parents can establish and build a relationship with someone who can serve as a regular babysitter. When the baby and parents are ready for a separation, the caregiver will be trusted, familiar and comfortable so that the parents have the best chance of enjoying their time together without excessive worry about the separation.

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